My sheets look like a crime scene.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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