Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
