Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
