No, drunk sperm still make babies.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.