it's too hot outside to masturbate.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
