And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize