those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Randomize
