I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
