doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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