Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Rumble strips road head = magical
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
