drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
