I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
be right there i have to get my cape
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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