just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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