I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
