Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
