HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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