I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
