she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
