i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
