nut hugger
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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