Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
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So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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