He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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