My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Found the puke drawer
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
