I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
