dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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