How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
