I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize