I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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