so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest