Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Randomize
