Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
So vagazzling was a success
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
