remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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