You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
