I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
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He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
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Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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