YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Someone shit on the floor
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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