Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Randomize
