Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
