hell yes lets make some ravioli
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
