i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
