do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
