seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
