Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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