:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
