My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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