let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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