You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
