See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
