it wasn't lemon gatorade
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
