I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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