fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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