mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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